Instant Massaging
After all the physical exercise from making cookies and little biscuits in the shape of hammers (see yesterday's entry) today I decided to relax with a massage in downtown Naperville.
"Velcum, follow me up ze ztairs," said Carol, my Lithuanian masseuse. I wondered briefly if she was related to my cleaner.
Unusually she didn't waste time asking me pointless questions like whether I had ever bruised my left knee or if there was a history of hay fever in my family.
"Jest get undressed, lie on zis bed and press ze svitch on ze vall vhen you are ready," she commanded, leaving the room.
My experiences with my cleaning service, has taught me nothing if not to take orders quietly, so I quickly obeyed. I undressed, popped my jewelry in a little tray and climbed onto the table. I had a slight panic when I realised I couldn't reach the switch from my position lying under the covers, but managed to resolve it by leaping up and back down again before Carol returned.
I have to say it was a truly relaxing experience. Well, mostly. Why she had to heat the bed when it was 90 degrees outside heaven knows. (No exaggeration, Chicago knows how to hold on the summer).
I was just dozing off when she stopped.
"I chem zo zorry," she said, more than a note of panic creeping into her voice. "I hev lost my earring. I zink it is oonder your right breast. Zis has never happened to me before."
Grabbing the sheet I raised myself on one elbow, trying to retain my modestly while searching for the earring. It turned out not to be an entire earring at all, but the tiny butterfly used for fastening. Eventually it tumbled out onto the table in front of me.
Back at work, Carol pushed my head down as she pummelled my head and neck. I felt my head descending into the head rest. I imagine it must be something like this for those poor unfortunates who have their heads flushed down toilets by school bullies.
An hour later it was all done.
"I hope you vill cum back again zoon," she smiled.
Maybe. Next time I'll tell her to put her jewelry in the tray also.
"Velcum, follow me up ze ztairs," said Carol, my Lithuanian masseuse. I wondered briefly if she was related to my cleaner.
Unusually she didn't waste time asking me pointless questions like whether I had ever bruised my left knee or if there was a history of hay fever in my family.
"Jest get undressed, lie on zis bed and press ze svitch on ze vall vhen you are ready," she commanded, leaving the room.
My experiences with my cleaning service, has taught me nothing if not to take orders quietly, so I quickly obeyed. I undressed, popped my jewelry in a little tray and climbed onto the table. I had a slight panic when I realised I couldn't reach the switch from my position lying under the covers, but managed to resolve it by leaping up and back down again before Carol returned.
I have to say it was a truly relaxing experience. Well, mostly. Why she had to heat the bed when it was 90 degrees outside heaven knows. (No exaggeration, Chicago knows how to hold on the summer).
I was just dozing off when she stopped.
"I chem zo zorry," she said, more than a note of panic creeping into her voice. "I hev lost my earring. I zink it is oonder your right breast. Zis has never happened to me before."
Grabbing the sheet I raised myself on one elbow, trying to retain my modestly while searching for the earring. It turned out not to be an entire earring at all, but the tiny butterfly used for fastening. Eventually it tumbled out onto the table in front of me.
Back at work, Carol pushed my head down as she pummelled my head and neck. I felt my head descending into the head rest. I imagine it must be something like this for those poor unfortunates who have their heads flushed down toilets by school bullies.
An hour later it was all done.
"I hope you vill cum back again zoon," she smiled.
Maybe. Next time I'll tell her to put her jewelry in the tray also.
posted by Hilary at
1:36 PM
2 Comments:
A bit different experience than the one you had with my dear neighbour, Janet, eh? True relaxation (sans the unfortunate jewellery) is always awaiting in Collingswood, my dear.
By
Unknown, at 8:39 PM
True, but I don't have to buy a flight in order to get to Naperville! Would make for an expensive hobby!
By
Anonymous, at 9:25 AM
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