Be Careful What You Wish For......

Ever since I was seven years old, I have wanted to be an author. It would be my way of leaving something behind after I am gone, apart from an untidy closet full of old clothes that are two sizes too small for me, that is.
I have been very lucky in that my work has been published in newspapers and magazines, but so far no elusive book deal.
If anyone is there is make my dreams come true, it’s Grumpy, so yesterday he made it happen, although not exactly as I would have expected.
He didn’t send off my barely started manuscript on my behalf. What he did was to secretly have the first year of this blog printed as a book. He had two copies made, one for us and one for Orphans No 1 and 2, which was only fair as the whole thing was Orphan No 1’s idea.
Unknown to me, several months ago he found a website that will publish your blog for you. Grumpy had to send off for the software, then he painstakingly copied the blog onto it, had to format each page individually and reorganize all the photographs.
Yesterday he got the books back from the printers and brought them home as a surprise. He was obviously expecting me to run round the house screaming with delight, so was obviously shocked at how shocked I was. So for anyone else thinking how ungrateful I am, let me try to explain.
1. As far as know, Grumpy and I never keep secrets from one another. (So don’t tell him in anything in confidence if you don’t want it to eventually make it into the Naperville Sun!)
As I had no idea about this, it suspiciously made me wonder if there is anything I should, or shouldn’t know? After all, if guilt ridden men having affairs give their wives flowers, what on earth would they have to have been up to warrant giving their wives their own book!!

2. Every success we have had in the United States has been because we visualized it first. Being accepted, having a lovely home and neighbours, Grumpy’s career going so well, getting a newspaper column etc has happened because we worked towards it and wished really, really hard. I’m worried that this book has made my dream come true in that area too, which therefore means I’ll never get a real book published.

3. Grumpy has a habit of suggesting a possible birthday present for himself, then buying it himself in advance. I thought he had ordered his own gift for next week.

Of course all that aside, not only do I have a unique coffee table book, but it also shows what an amazing family I have. That Orphan No 1 would have seen such a great opportunity and that Grumpy spent so much time into formatting it is very touching.

So if anyone is interested, I’ll be doing a book signing in my kitchen next week. Of course I only have my one copy, but I’m happy to sign it and give it to you so you can hand it back for the next person. Oh, and for what it’s worth, this is absolutely the best present I have ever had….