Toe to Toe

Have you ever headed for the dentist, a mammogram or an MRI and wished you were having a spa treatment instead? You'd be all relaxed and happy, instead of a nervous wreck worrying about pain and results. Last week I enjoyed a wonderful, but somewhat unusual pedicure at Coldwater Creek Spa in Naperville. (You might guess I'm going to say something nice in the hope they'll read this and offer me a free one next time. Anytime you catch me making up names means I'm terrified of a law suit).
I've had pedicures in this country before. They're much like in England. You go into a nail salon run by non English speaking Vietnamese, sit bolt up right in a massaging chair, they splash your feet with water, give them a quick rub, a bit of polish and charge you around $25.
I'd never experienced anything quite like this one before.
My technician spoke in hushed tones.
"I'm going to percolate your toes, massage your feet with eucalyptus and rosemary, simmer on a low heat for 45 minutes then decorate with raspberry coulis," she said.
(Of course that wasn't exactly what she said but something similar. I couldn't hear because she was whispering).
"And how about a relaxing eye mask?"
Eye mask? For a pedicure? What was she trying to hide from me?
"No? Well smell this instead." She put her fingers up to my nose. I was becoming less relaxed by the minute. I'd declined the eye mask, so what was she trying to do now? Knock me out with chloroform? Sometimes I'm my own worst enemy. Relaxing is not something that comes naturally to me.
"Now just relax," she breathed, noticing my fingers piercing the leather armrest.
Suddenly my chair started to move. Not vibrate, but move slowly backwards until I was virtually horizontal.
With a swift movement she pulled a light over my feet, which were suspended in mid air. Had I a made a mistake? It was like visiting your gynaecologist with your trousers on, or having a baby in a soap opera.
Lying back I couldn't see what she was doing exactly, so I peered across to the woman next to me who was also lying back flat with a mask on her face. Soft lighting and music did help me to relax a little, and I realised somewhat disappointingly that had I opted for the eye mask, I wouldn't be blinded by the light over my feet.
About 45 minutes later it was all over and I was led back to the relaxation room, where a hot towel was placed around my neck while I waited for my tootsies to dry.
Here's a tip. Don't get a pedicure if you have to put socks and winter boots on directly afterwards. Despite my best endeavours, I did smudge a couple of toes. Still, at this time of year, I guess no one will notice.