Status Update

I read with interest this week that Her majesty, the Queen, is launching her own facebook page. I'm not quite sure how she'll control it given the fact that she always seems to wear gloves, but I bet she'll be just as addicted as the rest of us are in no time. So just for her, I'm linking this blog post on facebook to give her a helping hand.

1. Your majesty should never need to update one's status. It should simply read "better than everyone else."
2. Your majesty should not have 'friends', but 'loyal subjects'. (You can block the disloyal ones).
3. Your majesty's 'wall' should have barbed wire along the top to keep one safe, much like one around the gardens of Buckingham Palace.
4. The info page's favourite quote should be "my husband and I."
5. Work should include "having the back of one's head licked and stuck on an envelope" and "laying in wallets" although she never seems to be in the second for quite long enough.
6. 'Home page' should read 'Palace page', although admittedly this may be confusing for the poor chap who holds that job.
7. Your majesty may play Cafe World but will only use it to drink tea.
8. Your majesty should invent a new game called Commonwealth Ville of which one will be head.
9. Your majesty should try the quiz 'which queen are you most like?" but not be surprised when the result shows Queen Victoria.
10. Instead of broadcasting her Christmas message on the BBC, one should just send it as a message to all her 'subjects'.