Midday Madness

The trouble with sale shopping is you never know what you're going to get. There's no point in making a list because you are guaranteed those will be the exact things you cannot find anywhere.

Today was Black Friday, the day after Thanksgiving when the holiday shopping season kicks off. We learnt our lesson on our first Thanksgiving, so no more midnight madness for us. This year, it was midday madness instead. Just as ridiculous but at least you get a good night's sleep.

Being a shopaholic, Grumpy was not happy with my plan.

"We'll just get up when we feel like it and see if we can get into Fox Valley Mall," I said.

"But what about the special door busters?" he complained.

"We don't need anything to bust our door down," I answered. "It'll be fine."

At a more sane time of day, we had no problem parking. The mall was busy but accessible. The trouble was, we didn't really need anything. It's all very well hunting for a bargain, but to my mind it's not a true bargain unless you actually want the thing in the first place.

Grumpy was dismayed I didn't want a Kitchen Aid food mixer at a great price.

"But it'll be great for those times you want to bake," he said.

"What? Twice a year?" I answered.

"How about this great sewing machine? It's a steal."

"I don't need it for anything though," I said.

"I might need you to do something for me with it though," he replied.

He obviously didn't know me in my when I took needlework class at school and broke the needle constantly because the thread was too tight. I doubt he'd want a floral sleeveless blouse that looks like a box either.

Finally I relented. At 12.20 p.m. we were in line with the following unnecessary items that you would never put on a list.

1. A lamp shaped like a cocktail glass complete with stirrer and decorative slice of star fruit on the slide.

2. A box of storage boxes.

3. A plastic jar that counts your coins as you save them.

4. A pair of binoculars.

At 12.57 p.m. Grumpy started hyperventilating when he realised we didn't have any of the 8,000 coupons which had arrived with yesterday's newspapers. At 12.58 we reached the cashier to find a spare coupon at the til which much to Grumpy's relief, saved us about 90 cents. By 1 p.m. we were done.

As he struggled to take all our booty to the car, I could see a sense of triumph on Grumpy's face. I was just sorry I couldn't drink the contents of my cocktail lamp....