Author! Author!
It took Mrs Hammerstein and myself about six months to write Holy Neuteronomy! (on at Congregation Beth Shalom this weekend, order your tickets now on 630 961 1818). Auditions were in December and the 27 strong cast have been rehearsing relentlessly since January. As you might imagine it's been a lot of hard work, but nothing has been as hard as the final piece of the puzzle.
This week I've been working on my 'thank you' speech for the end of the show. I know it's nothing to worry about really. After all, the cast will have been acting their socks off all night, and all I have to do is jump up say a few thank yous and sit back down. Easy, right? If you think that, you obviously don't know me very well.
After seeing my speech on the DVD for last year's show I was unhappy about four things.
1. I used the word 'magnificent' over and over again, so I have to make sure I don't use it all this time.
2. I relied on my notes far too much, so this year I'm not having any.
3. I had troubling juggling the microphone and other things.
4. I looked huge. (Guess I'll just have to live with that one).
So all week I've been perfecting what should thankfully be a very short speech. Trouble is, confident as I am as a writer, I'm very nervous on stage, which is probably why I'm not actually in the show. (That and a lack of acting and singing talent, of course).
I've been vile to the cast telling them they are under pain of death if they interrupt me, which includes our wonderful cantor who is doing a cameo and the musicians who only wanted to play Happy Birthday to me.
I've practised my tiny speech a thousand times, mostly in the middle of the night when I can't sleep for worrying about it. I've visualized the audience falling off their seats laughing which helps a bit unless they're laughing for the wrong reasons.
I've changed my clothes twenty times, which isn't easy when you only have four things to choose from. I've demanded a mic to wear from our sound man so I don't have to hold one and had the locks changed at the synagogue so no one will be able to escape the building until I'm ready to let them free.
Of course no one will be aware of any of my angst on the big night because they'll be happily enjoying the show, unless they've read this of course. But here's the truth. Although I've spent incalculable time and effort on this show which is meant to showcase the talent and warmth of our congregation to the outside community, when it comes down to it, I'm afraid it's all about me...
This week I've been working on my 'thank you' speech for the end of the show. I know it's nothing to worry about really. After all, the cast will have been acting their socks off all night, and all I have to do is jump up say a few thank yous and sit back down. Easy, right? If you think that, you obviously don't know me very well.
After seeing my speech on the DVD for last year's show I was unhappy about four things.
1. I used the word 'magnificent' over and over again, so I have to make sure I don't use it all this time.
2. I relied on my notes far too much, so this year I'm not having any.
3. I had troubling juggling the microphone and other things.
4. I looked huge. (Guess I'll just have to live with that one).
So all week I've been perfecting what should thankfully be a very short speech. Trouble is, confident as I am as a writer, I'm very nervous on stage, which is probably why I'm not actually in the show. (That and a lack of acting and singing talent, of course).
I've been vile to the cast telling them they are under pain of death if they interrupt me, which includes our wonderful cantor who is doing a cameo and the musicians who only wanted to play Happy Birthday to me.
I've practised my tiny speech a thousand times, mostly in the middle of the night when I can't sleep for worrying about it. I've visualized the audience falling off their seats laughing which helps a bit unless they're laughing for the wrong reasons.
I've changed my clothes twenty times, which isn't easy when you only have four things to choose from. I've demanded a mic to wear from our sound man so I don't have to hold one and had the locks changed at the synagogue so no one will be able to escape the building until I'm ready to let them free.
Of course no one will be aware of any of my angst on the big night because they'll be happily enjoying the show, unless they've read this of course. But here's the truth. Although I've spent incalculable time and effort on this show which is meant to showcase the talent and warmth of our congregation to the outside community, when it comes down to it, I'm afraid it's all about me...
posted by Hilary at
9:36 AM
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