It's An Urban Jungle Out There

When you're trying to become a celebrity, there are two routes you can travel. One: hang out in a Costa Rican jungle for a couple of weeks with an NBC camera crew, or two: hang out in downtown Naperville with other local celebs.
Prefering to risk the urban jungle, last night Grumpy and I went along to Networking for a Cause at Naperville Cultural Center. Unfortunately I wasn't able to network with anyone I didn't know already, but did rub shoulders with local TV personalities, councilmen, media and PR people. We had a good time, but I just can't help noticing how different people here are. The smallest thing is so exciting to them that you just can't help but get swept up in the moment.
Perhaps the oddest thing was the auction. Now you would think that if you had Dave Savini of CBS television and Dolly McCarthy of NCTV, they would be happy to run it for you. To be honest, I think they would have been, if they hadn't been completely side-stepped by Naperville's 'world famous' dentist, Anthony La Vacca (note I'm kindly not giving celebrities blog names because I feel they deserve (and probably want) all they get).
Within minutes Dr La Vacca had really got his teeth into it. Perhaps he sold sheep in a previous life, although I guess coming from New York this was somewhat unlikely. The auction went on for hours, although I'm not sure he completely got the hang of what he was meant to do because he bought half the items himself.
Probably the strangest bid was for a set of invisilign braces - clear plastic braces that have replaced the horrible metal train tracks of the past. They went for a bargain at just over $3,000! I can just imagine the successful bidder running home to tell his family!
I guess I'm fitting into the local celebrity scene quite well, albeit as the class clown. I'm like the podgy girl in class who makes everybody laugh. All my new 'friends' are scrumptious blondes with beautiful teeth (no doubt supplied by Dr LaVacca). Heck, two of them were former models! I'm the short fat one who feels like she's in a forest as she looks up to talk to them.
Maybe it's not as unlike the jungle as I thought.

All In A Good Cause

"So, what exactly is this special luncheon today?" I asked Kay Mary as we drove to the White Eagle Club this morning. I knew it was a Rotary lunch, but this time it was for people to receive Paul Harris Awards.
"Oh we have it every year," she said nonchalantly. "You'll be getting an award too."
"What?" I exclaimed. "What have I done to deserve an award, particularly one no one told me about?"
Turns out that all new Naperville Rotarians receive an award for donations made. Fortunately all I had to do was stand up when my name was called out with other new members, which just made me feel like I'd done something naughty during school dinners. I believe at some time in the future I'll receive a medal, which is odd, because I only deserve one for putting up with Grumpy all these years.
The event actually turned out to be far more interesting than I thought, since various members of the community received awards for good works. Two of them, Annette Swanson and Julie Utter, run a non for profit church organization raising awareness and funds for women in Kenya. I was particularly pleased at this, because apparently they were brought to the attention of Rotary by an article I wrote about them a few months ago.
I usually feel very undeserving at Rotary meetings, since most people do tons for the community and all I do is write about it. But I suppose something like this is means even that tiny bit is sometimes worthwhile.

The Great Outdoors Part II

This weekend we have a third visitor, my gbf. Taking advantage of 84 degree weather, we went to the Morton Arboretum.

The Great Outdoors

Indian Harvest

Guess who we found at Starved Rock? Midwest Soarring performing another Pow Wow.


This Eagle was scouting for trouble makers. Lucky he didn't spot us.

Cock a hoop, this 11-year-old took the art of hoola hoop to a whole new level.

Everyone shook their tail feathers.

The Indian spirits expressed their pleasure with a beautiful rainbow.

Showing us all how...

Juno the dog was just a pussy cat.

Into The Woods

After deciding against the boy scout camping trip (see previous entry Camping It Up), this weekend we took our guests to spend a night in a luxurious log cabin at the Starved Rock State Park.

Grumpy seemed right at home in a little cottage in the woods, although he couldn't find the other six dwarves anywhere.

General Impression

This weekend the Naper Settlement is holding it's annual Civil War Days, so we took our Australian visitors along to get some sense of American history.

Custer's Last Stand, or at least a general impression of it!

Among the attractions, a petting zoo. How many sheep can you count? One, two, zzzzzz.

Spinning classes provided people with less exercise than the ones we have these days.

Your army needs you! Still recruiting, years on..

The last person I expected to see at a Civil War re enactment was a member of the Coldstream Guards, but apparently they were sent as observers to other wars.

Grumpy puts on a brave face...

From Our Civil War Correspondent

The Civil War continues to rage in Naperville, Illinois. Our esteemed President, Abraham Lincoln today held a press conference before battle commenced..

Of course some of the soldiers were a little tired after fighting for a couple of hundred years.

Shooting the enemy, 2009 style.

"Those Confederates are just cannon fodder!"

Proving that some armies definitely march on their stomachs, a warning as to what can happen when you don't get enough rations, and when you perhaps get a few too many.

Sometimes you can aim too high.

Coyoti Beauties (and me)

Ok, I dare you to spot the 'celebrity'. Just in case you don't know who they are, the three blonds are Cameron Diaz, Kate Winslet and Marilyn Monroe, the brunette on the right is Angelina Jolie and the man in the middle is Robert De Niro. (Better known as Kristy Kasen-Brezinsky, Kristen Frederick, (of Two K Productions) Dolly McCarthy (NCTV anchor), Lindy Kleivo (Founder and editor of The Glancer magazine) and Anthony LaVacca (the world's most famous dentist).

Bottoms Up!

I used to think doctors, teachers, lawyers and the like were wonderful at what they did, but today I have a new found respect for that most humblest of positions - the bar tender! Last night's fundraiser was great fun, but boy do they work hard. After taking five minutes to open a beer and find the gun that squirted soda (not in the same drink, I might add) I realised it was not an easy job. After trying to mix a Cosmo (which you'd think I'd be able to do since it's my personal favourite) and ending up with a glass full of ice cubes, I decided to look for something easier to do.
Luckily I found my calling at the glass washing machine. It's like a mini car wash only you don't have to drive in. Simply hold the glass over it for a minute, then dunk it into two sinks and voila! As the event really got under way I realised this had another benefit. If I kept my head down no one could catch my eye, which meant they couldn't ask me for a Wallalooza Wallbanger or whatever they were saying. The celebrity bit had long gone out of the window, although I was somewhat jealous to see a local dentist signing autographs!
It occurred to me that anyone stumbling in off the street wouldn't necessarily know it was a fundraiser, and might just think it was the worst run bar in town. Fortunately there were a couple of professionals to help us, one of whom seemed particularly grateful for my glass washing skills because it kept me away from the cocktail shaker.
Not sure how much we raised it total, but we secured $1,500 in tips alone and had a great time. And for a minute at least, it was almost like having a real job...

Barred!

I thought celebrity bar tending would be fun, but now I'm not so sure. Had a quick practise last night, and do you know, it's like a real job? I was hoping there would be a jug of something made up I could pour out, but no, I'm meant to make cocktails, open beers and pour wine. To make matters worse, the other bar tenders are young, slim and beautiful (well, apart from the one man amongst us, although he's still way younger than I am).
So the way I see it, while they're flitting about being perky and lovely, I'm going to wrap my hair in a scarf, put on overalls and mop the floors. I'll run round collecting glasses and sweep peanut shells off the floor. It's actually a very sophisticated establishment, so I'll have to drop them their first myself, but at least it'll keep me out of the way of the bar.

Leaving Las Vegas

Finally its good night from Vegas with this aptly named hotel....

Show Time

When you're in Vegas, you have to go to a show, so we caught up with the Rat Pack. I-Sis thought 'Frank Sinatra' looked more like her osteopath, but Dean Martin wasn't bad.

Fortune Rookie

What made Vegas extra special this time was that we met my sister I-Sis and brother-in-law the Wizard of Aus there. I-Sis (guess that would make me 2-Sis if I had a blog name, but of course I don't) likes to dabble in the odd bit of magic, so lost no time in seeking her fortune at Zoltar's stand.

"Great," says the Wizard. "Looks like we're in for a great trip."

Vibrant Vegas

There are pyramids, but it's not Egypt....

There's a Statue of Liberty, but it's not New York...

It's fabulous Las Vegas. This hotel is very special to Grumpy and me. We stayed their on our honeymoon. It was the height of glamour in 1981, but unfortunately they haven't updated or cleaned it since. Never mind, nice to keep our memories intact.

In Vegas you can see every colour of the rainbow

Meet all kinds of characters

and of course there's always this...

Celebrity Bar Tending Alert

Back from Vegas, but busy with guests so will update later. Just wanted to remind you all to come along to Sullivan's Steakhouse, Naperville at 6 p.m. Tuesday evening, where I'm celebrity bartending. Must dash, off to a practise. I'm hopeless at mixing drinks and taking money (although quite good at spending it). So you can be assured of strong drinks, violently underpriced. Hope to see you there.

Being Prepared

Following the Atlanta debacle when I arrived at airport security without my photo id and ended up having to use my Costco card, this time I'm well prepared.
To quote that old memory game, "I packed my suitcase and I in it I put.."
1. My driver's licence.
2. Two work permits (there's an overlap but the good news is it will only take me six months to earn what they cost me).
3. The giant portrait of me that usually hangs in my attic getting younger as I get older (thanks to Oscar Wilde for that idea, although I may have got it slightly mixed up!)
4. The entire 2004-6 photo album.
5. A digital photo album with a selection of world travels. It takes a lot to impress an airport security guard these days.
6. A sketch of me drawn by the seven-year-old across the street.
7. My Naperville Sun newspaper column which carries my photo.
8. A print out of my Naperville On line Weekly column which carries a very fetching cartoon of me.
9. A caricature done by an artist in Montmartre, Paris. Oops, nearly forget to add France there for you Americans.
10. A mirror.
I have it all neatly squished in just behind the print out for my ticket. Ticket? Ticket! Hang on, I'll be right back....

Viva Las Vegas!

Grumpy and I are off on another little jaunt tomorrow. For Grumpy, Vegas is like Mecca to Muslims, New York to shopaholics and Naperville to me. (Today I'm officially launching the 'Build a statue of Hilary Decent in Downtown Naperville Campaign' so I can't waste any opportunity).
We've been a few times before, but not since we've been living here. This time will be extra special because we're meeting my sister and her husband there, so at least I'll have someone to talk to while Grumpy is otherwise engaged. So look out for fab photos, more puns and a quirky look at the town over the next few days. Remember, what happens in Vegas stays on my blog...

Happy Cinco de Mayo!

I'm not sure how to exactly celebrate Cinco de Mayo today. For a start I'm English, so until last year I'd never even heard of it. But it's a big deal here in the States. According to Wikipedia, the font of all knowledge posted by people who've little idea what they're talking about:
"The holiday commemorates the Mexican army's unlikely defeat of French forces at the Battle of Puebla on May 5th, 1862 under the leadership of Mexican General Ignacio Zaragoza Seguin."
So not one to miss out on an excuse to party, here's what I am thinking of doing:
1. Get a large jar of Hellman's and pour it down the sink.
2. Go to a Mexican restaurant and get roaring drunk.
3. Go to Mexico and say "good news, swine flu is over", bad news "it's being taken over by seafood flu which makes you feel really crabby."
4. Go to a French restaurant and say "have you heard, they're opening a Mexican restaurant next door?"

It May Be Art But....

Today was a typical day in Naperville. The sun shone, the band played, the mayor made a speech and all the movers and shakers of the city came out to wonder at a new statue unveiled on the Riverwalk. The statue, dedicated to Harold and Margaret Moser, is the 33rd in the Century Art Walk series. Visitors to Naperville can't fail to miss the pieces of art which adorn the downtown area. The Mosers were local philanthropists who were so loved they were given the titles of Mr and Mrs Naperville. They already have the magnificent carillon tower named after them, but now they have their very own statues.

Our esteemed Mayor Pradel kicks off the proceedings with a rousing speech.

No peeking now...

The excitement grows as the tarpaulin is lifted to reveal....